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Why Therapy Won’t Work If You’re Not Ready

Story By: Anjanae Freitas, Entertainment Editor

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When I decided to treat therapy as my recovery rather than my chore, I realized I wasted my teenage years being a misery factory. Soon enough, therapy became my new safe place.

At 15 years old, I saw a therapist for the first time. I had no desire to understand why I was clinically depressed and anxious, but therapy felt like the right place to start.

I remember my therapist asked the typical questions. “What brings you here?” I sat in silence thinking, “Well if I knew, why would I be here?” I was angry, I had no desire to be a teenager in therapy.

I wanted to be normal and do “normal” things like my friends. I didn’t want to worry about what my emotions meant.

After my first few sessions, I was convinced that my first therapist was definitely my last. I felt that therapy served no purpose to my growth, but in reality I was not ready for help. When I thought I was fine, I was struggling internally. Asking for help did not make me weak, it showed my strength to better myself. But for some reason, my brain wouldn’t allow me to think otherwise.

When I was 19, I realized that part of being an adult was going to involve working on my personal and professional communication within all my relationships in my life. I had childhood traumas to expose myself to and I had unhealthy coping mechanisms to let go of.

Therefore, I gave therapy one more try. As I sat across from my second therapist, I felt as if she was reading out of a self-help book. I didn’t believe anything coming out of her mouth. What made her qualified enough to change my life? Her Ph.D? Nothing seemed beneficial enough for me to find healing. I felt completely lost.When I was 20, I decided that I had grown. I realized that it wasn’t that therapy didn’t work for me, I was too pessimistic to work hard enough for therapy.

Finally after going into my third therapist, the light switch that had been broken was finally turned back on.

There was two major reasons for my new optimism:

First, my therapist was a perfect match for me, her approach and treatment plan to push me forward was clear enough to motivate me. It was not even a matter of “Will this work?” It was the first time that my therapist had instilled in me that growth was a two way communication and it was time for me to grow up.

Second, but most importantly, I learned that a therapist cannot do their job effectively if the person seeking help isn’t actually ready to surrender.

When I opened my mind up to the idea of being mindful, I was able to be more present. Being present allowed me to process my healing. Through my healing, I found the bravery in being soft.

Now as a 21-year-old, I have not mastered the skills to life. However, I have found tools in therapy that allow me to grow, to heal, and to communicate effectively in all my relationships.

There is no timestamp to seeking help. When you know, you’ll know.

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About the Writer
Anjanae Freitas, Entertainment Editor

Anjanae Freitas is a 21-year-old Fresno City College student, and the Art and Entertainment Editor of the Rampage, born and raised in Fresno, CA.

During her time at Fresno City College, she found interest in the field of journalism, where she received her AA in journalism in the spring of 2018. She will continue to pursue her BA at Fresno State University in Mass Communications/Journalism Spring 2019.

One of her passions is poetry, Anjanae connects with poetry because it is an embodiment of the soul and human experience. Through poetry Anjanae as found not just her passion, but a way to mask healing and communicate her vulnerability. Anjanae released her first book of poetry on Amazon Kindle titled Bees & Weeds, in August, 2018.

One of her other passions is photography, which she developed through the many concerts and traveling she has done over the years. During a Katy Perry concert, Anjanae had the opportunity to be in the “Katy Perry 3D” movie.  Throughout all three of these hobbies and attending the film’s premiere, she has made connections within the industry where she was given an opportunity to collaborate with Capitol Records Street Team for Katy Perry. Through this line of work, she has been given many invitations to attend different entertainment events in Los Angeles.

Anjanae is leading towards the career field of social media management for the television and film industry. Her biggest accomplishment was having the opportunity to spend a day at Warner Bros. studio for Freeform’s hit show “The Fosters.” The event was significant in her career because it made Anjanae aware of and passionate about the representation that the television and film industry puts out in our society. Her aspirations in the entertainment industry would be to promote diversity and create strategies for companies to increase their representation of women, minorities, and the LGBTQ community both in front of and behind the camera, and on social media.

Ultimately, Anjanae’s career goal is to receive her MA in counseling to become a licensed Family & Marriage therapist.

You can contact Anjanae Freitas at [email protected]

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