The Zen Guide To Insensitivity: Women Need To Break Free From Archaic Terms
April 11, 2012
“I’ve finished writing the letter, but do I address it to Miss, Mrs. or Ms.? Does she have a husband?” Have you had this conversation with yourself before?
Women think they’re asserting their independence by having different titles in front of their names. In actuality, women are asserting their subservience through the use of the terms Miss and Mrs.
The titles we have agreed to give to women are sexist. The term “Mrs.” stands for “Mistress” and is used for women who are married. “Miss” is a title for a girl or a young unmarried woman. “Ms.” is a blend of the first two, and is generally reserved for unmarried or divorced women.
Men have one title, “Mr.” The term “Mister” is used for men aged 18 and up, and although it isn’t widely used anymore, for boys under 18, it means “Master.”
Men get to be the master and women get to be submissive.
These are facts that we decided on long ago and haven’t bothered to second-guess.
It is becoming more normal for women to keep their maiden names after marriage. However, women are still voluntarily labeling themselves as “Mrs.” in an attempt to tell the world that they’ve found a husband. Thank you; we get it.
Men don’t bother with such things. They don’t have to change their title of “Mr.” to anything else when they get married. It wouldn’t even occur to men to take their wives’ last names after marriage. In the end the internal sentiment a man has is still, “why would I take her last name, I’m the man.”
Where’s the equality?
Equality is a myth that we’ve told ourselves so that we could stop dealing with gender injustices.
Men still make more money than women. According to the 2010 U.S. Census, full-time working women make 77 cents for every $1 a man makes.
It gets worse. The money gap gets even wider the more education a woman has. Women in upper level executive, administrative and managerial occupations earn an average of 72.3 cents for every $1 a man makes in the same position.
They’re making more with that college degree, but it’s still less than a man.
Minority women have even less success with income. African-American women make an average of 64 cents for men’s $1; Hispanic women make 52 cents for men’s $1.
Women earn less than men in 99 percent of all occupations.
Equality is a lie.
If the equality of women is such an obvious fallacy of what the world should be, why do women allow themselves to be blatantly and intentionally submissive to men by adopting a title that by definition makes them subservient?
The war for women’s rights is over; they “won.”
Women have come a long way, but true equality is still a long way off. The current Republican fight over contraception and abortion is not only a hurdle, it’s actually a step backward.
“What does it say about the college co-ed [Sandra] Fluke who goes before a congressional committee and essentially says that she must be paid to have sex — what does that make her?” Rush Limbaugh said. “It makes her a slut, right? It makes her a prostitute. She wants to be paid to have sex. She’s having so much sex she can’t afford the contraception. She wants you and me and the taxpayers to pay her to have sex.”
That statement by Rush Limbaugh is an example of free speech, it is also an example of ignorance. This is not a typical view of a man, but it does say a lot about our society when someone like him has a loyal following.
Women should get together and decide on a title that does not change depending on marital status or one that denotes age. The titles Miss and Mrs. need to go.
Despite women being half of the world’s population, there is still resistance to change in our society. Women and men both have a voice, and they should speak out together to fight for equal rights.
Fight for women’s equality in the workplace; fight for equality in general. It isn’t possible unless we try.
Alice Walker said, “The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.”